Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
Randomize
