The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize
