do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
whose parrot is this?
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize
