rhymes with "ouble enetration"
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
