I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
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