He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize
