This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
Randomize
