i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
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