I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Randomize
