It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
