pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
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