I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
you inspire me to be a worse person
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
