ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Randomize
