You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
