Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
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