Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
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