All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Randomize
