i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
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