Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
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