There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
Randomize
