I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
