Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
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