i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
i can't believe i had my finger in that
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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