you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
Randomize
