Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
Randomize
