We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
Randomize
