i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
Randomize
