why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
