I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
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