just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Randomize
