dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
Randomize
