I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
He passed out mid-signature
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
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