I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Randomize
