is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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