I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Just woke up wearing a top hat and simpsons boxers. i also found more money in my wallet then what i had before going out, about $1000 more
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
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