i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Randomize
