ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
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