Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
I just want to make out with him forever
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize