yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
I woke up wearing no shirt sleeping next to a half-eaten grilled cheese.
Well did you call the grilled cheese yet? Or r u waiting the usual 3 days?
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
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