If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
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