The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
Randomize
