Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
Randomize
