this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
that may or may not have been my penis.
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