My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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