i don't plan on having that self control this summer
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Randomize
