bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
