so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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