weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
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