I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
You were spooning an empty magnum of white wine in the middle of the bed so I slept on the couch
Well at least there's no more confusion about your place in my life. Wine > pizza > your dick > the rest of you.
Love you...
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize