at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
Randomize
