he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
Semen is not good for contacts.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
Randomize
